Saturday, October 16, 2004

we always learn new stuff.

i learnt something new today. something related to what i've been thinking of for an awfully trying period. something i never thought of at all when considering all the possible possibilities.

we all haf different ways of dealing with circumstances, internal and/or external. how we deal with the situation would affect no one at best, but that's rare. more often than not, u'll get affected by it and the worst is if u affect those around you while dealing with it. thats sad.

one person was kind of involved, emotionally physically, in this situation which involved other pple, or person rather. this person din want to continue being involved and din want to risk sinking deeper and deeper into the situation. instead of doing an internal shuffle to allow the situation to persist, just not in such an intense way, this person actually chose to pull out of it completely, emotionally physically. why this person chose that route i'm still wondering. the thing is that when this person pulled out entirely, pple around were affected somehow negatively, in a not so nice sort of manner. not nice. not good. not helpful to the situation. at all.

and now, those around who were affected are thinking of confronting this person. i think it should be done asap, to avoid having this person moving back any further and affecting them and the situation anymore than he already has.

some pple haf not been in a good mood lately. wish i could do something. bing's complaining that sha and i are neglecting her..and that she's super stressed in sch. well, guess wat: the 2 of us are super stressed too..wish she could think that way.

my whole weekend is gonna be like this: stuffing my head with memory, stuffing my head with intelligence, stuffing my head with child development. how exciting. i enjoy learning such stuff, i honestly do. but i need more time to get all that info into my head..i'm not a walking sponge. i feel so mentally inadequate, my brain doesn seem to absorb info as well as before, my mind doesn seem to be able to throw away all distractions and concentrate as well as before..i could do those pretty well in secondary sch. i din really haf to do that much in jc, cos math fmath physics chemistry really onli require formulas and a calculator, (and abit of words).

i'm tired, i dun like dealing with such complicated stuff. actually objectively and logically speaking, things are really not that bad. but add in emotions and ka-boom! things are bigger than they appear to be. i'm gonna do something next week. something that i've been thinking of doing for quite a while, but just didnt dare to for fear of the process and outcome of it. sha gave me that boost of courage to go do it, and i shall. just get it over and done with, and hopefully it would help matters.